Mar 2, 2011

I Am the Platypus (to the tune of I Am the Walrus)

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
See how they run like ROOKER from GUNN, see how they fly.
I'm WRITING.

Sitting on a JOHN DEERE, waiting for the SLUGS to come.
CARNIVEROUS SQUID-MAN, stupid CEPH-A-LO-POD.
Man, you been a naughty boy, you made MACREADY frown.
I am the PIBBman, they are the PIBBmen.
I am the PLATYPUS, goo goo g'joob.

Small town PARDY policeman sitting
SMARTY FARTY policeman in a row.
See how they fly like WEEVIL in the sky, see how they run.
I'm WRITING, i'm WRITING.
I'm WRITING, i'm WRITING.

Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye.
Everywoman SLUGWIFE, GRANT GRANT'S TROPHY priestess,
Boy, you been a "HARDCORE BITCH" you stabbed the FENCE POST down.
I am the PIBBman, they are the PIBBmen.
I am the PLATYPUS, goo goo g'joob.

Sitting in an CAR IN WHEELSY CLOCKIN' ALL THE BIRDS.
If the BIRDS don't come, you get ABSORBED
BY ANCIENT PRI-MOR-DI-AL SCUM.
I am the PIBBman, they are the PIBBmen.
I am the PLATYPUS, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.

NIPPLE FLIPPER DOG DEFILER,
Don't you think THAT STARLA laughs at you?
See how they WHINE like BRENDA in the sty,
See how they CRY.
I'm WRITING.

STRUTEMEYER DAUGHTERS, climbing ON THEIR PAPA'S TRUCK.
Elementary CHILDREN TAUGHT BY TROMA'S FINEST.
Man, you should have seen them WATCHING MELVIN MOP THE FLOOR.
I am the PIBBman, they are the PIBBmen.
I am the PLATYPUS, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.
Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob g'goo. ..

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